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Falling into the abyss doesn’t feel
like anything after a long while.
My days are no longer
distinguishable from one another –
flurries of functionalities mixed
with blurry faces that just breeze by.
Everyday, the same pointless whirlwind.

At times there is
a flashback of a past life,
a past me, a universe
of possibilities. The world
a vast wonderland. There
used to be longing.
Used to be.

I can’t remember how many times
I’ve screamed for help
only to keep hearing
a barrage of voices telling me
my words are nonsense. I’m just
imagining the fall, the abyss.

Everyday, the whirlwind.
My feet never touching
the ground, unable to
walk forward. Days keep
passing. I no longer
recognize my face.

There is no escape –
only submission.